Spirit

I love having a relationship with the holy spirit, because I feel over time like he is actually making progress on me. It is so great to have themes that pop up in your life in so many ways, that you can't deny that God is speaking to you. It is amazing to hear a sermon that puts words to the burdens in your heart at the moment. For me, there is no denying that it is God talking into my life. My current theme has been about my desire for significance. How often, I try to take the things that God is doing, and make them all about me, or at very least bend into my life.

God is so much bigger than I could ever bend. Lets face it, I can't even get my hands around him. I am coming to a greater place of insignificance in the world, and with it a great joy in my soul. God's presence is so near, and so comforting. I think this is the joy I have been studying and it is so different than feeling happy. I feel full, satisfied, and peaceful about it.

Thank you God, for being so much more than I can imagine. Thank you for loving me enough to keep whispering in my ear and patient enough to not get frustrated that you have to repeat yourself time and time again. It is starting to sink in. Staring to become more the norm for me.

The thing that draws me back from dwelling in the place, is the realization of how horrid I am. How not worthy I am of what God is. The closer I get to this place of surrender to Christ, the more I see the ugliness of my sin and how frequently it happens. Don't get me wrong, I don't feel fear or condemnation, but what I feel is humility from deep within.

I would like to imagine that the longer I live a life of surrender, the less I will sin. I think that might be making it all about me again. God isn't looking for me to eventually be perfect. He just wants me to put my pride aside and be with him. He wants me to run to him with reckless abandon.


Movements -- Rend Collective Experiement
I wanna soar with you, upon wings like eagles.
But I'll grow with you too, when the dark and lonely questions come.

I wanna stand true, no matter what 's new or comes through.
I cannot stand still, whatever hits, I keep making movements to you.

I'm running fast and free to you, cause you are the movement and fight in me.
I'm running fast and free to you, cause you are my home, where I want to be.
Come move in me. Where I want to be, come move in me.

I wanna flow with you, the currents driving me.
But I'll paddle hard too, when the waves and rapids overcome.

I wanna stand firm, when my minds weak and my emotions fail.
I wanna stand true, whatever hits, I keep making movements to you.

I'm running fast and free to you, cause you are the movement and fight in me.
I'm running fast and free to you, cause you are my home, where I want to be.
Come move in me. Where I want to be, come move in me.
I won't walk away. Won't walk away.

I'm running fast and free to you, cause you are the movement and fight in me.
I'm running fast and free to you, cause you are my home.