Thankful for Food Allergies

My sister wrote a beautiful blog today http://andrewssusan.blogspot.com/2011/06/gratitude.html?spref=fb that prompted me to try to reprogram my thinking. You see, yesterday was a sad day for me. My daughter got hives from wheat flour. My daughter, who is almost 8, has always been allergic to wheat. I have know this since she was 6 months old. So, the fact that it gave her hives yesterday shouldn’t have been a big deal.

A brief version of the story is that at 6 months old, when Ellie was first diagnosed with allergies, the doctors all told me she would surely grow out of them. They have confirmed this theory every summer since, on our yearly visit to the allergist. Yet, here we are, with an 8 year old who can't eat wheat, dairy, eggs, nuts and flaxseed.

So, about 6 months ago we began trying acupressure because we know of several people whom had success with this. We figured it was worth a shot. However, it seems when ever it comes to us testing our allergens out, Ellie gets hives.

Because wheat would certainly make our lives so much easier, I was really praying about this one. I had so much hope it would work. And yet again, I ended up disappointed.

So while I cried to my husband last night, I brought up all the worst kind of self pity. Why did it work for so many people and not us? Why didn't my child grow out of these things, like so many others? Why won't my child get to go to summer camp, and missions trips? Why me? Poor me.

So today, I read my sisters words just before going out for a run. (Which I have been motivated to do based on my other sisters blog. They are both fabulous if you ask me. http://phil313-14.blogspot.com/2011/06/just-say-no.html ) I decided to change my self pity into thanksgiving.

So, while running, here are just a few of the things I realized I have to be thankful for.

1. Ellie has never been to the emergency room, and we have never needed the epi-pen. That would be a whole level of fear that I haven't had to deal with.
2. Ellie's food haven't cause behavioral or emotional issues for her. I know those things can happen, and are often much more challenging to deal with and rectify.
3. I have learned a new kind of discipline.
4. I have learned to be thankful for growing through something.
5. Ellie is compassionate and sensitive to others with special needs.
6. As I ran, I felt strong and healthy, and thought what a blessing it is that my daughter is too. Food might be limited for her, but that doesn't mean she is limited.
7. My husband is wonderfully supportive and a great listener. He didn't tell me to snap out of my self pity, though he could have. It is much nicer coming from God.
8. We are living in a world with so many options for food that she can have, and people are so much more aware.
9. She is finally getting old enough to read and protect herself.
10. I tell my kids often that they will keep learning as they keep trying. This is true for me too, I will keep learning as we keep her safe through alternative foods.

I came home feeling like a changed person. I know there are more reason to be thankful, and I will keep finding them all the time. The only change today is my perspective. Ellie still can't eat lots of food that the rest of us love, and maybe she never will. But God will do a good work in all of us. He is alive and active will turn even our ugly self pity into his lovely creation.

Happy Mother's Day

What a lovely Friday it has been, packed with many of my very favorite activities. I did some crafting, some cleaning, some snuggling with my kids. I baked cookies, took a bath an even had a friend stop by with a surprise blessing too. And all throughout the sun was beaming, lifting my spirits.

Now I have a quiet and clean house, while clean children sleep in their beds. This is very satisfying to me. On this very happy day, with my happy heart, I wrote cards for my mom and mother-in-law for Mother's Day. I am amazingly blessed in this category, and told them as much.

But, just as I was putting my kids to bed, I got a little Mother's Day gift of my own. No one spoiled the surprise, and I didn't go snooping. I was doing the most mundane of things and was so, so blessed.

After Ellie got out of the shower, I sat down to put cream on her skin. I realize that this practice probably stops for most people when their babies become mobile at age 1. But, since Ellie who is 7,has such bad eczema we still do it, every time she gets out of the shower. Today, she stayed home sick. She just has a head cold, but it seemed enough to have her home. It really was a joy for both of us.

As I was creaming she said, "thanks for always taking care of me mommy, just like God does." I said "God can do a lot more than I can. I just put cream on."
She said, "you do more than that. You take care of me when I am sick, and take care of my skin. You teach me to read and write, you teach promiseland (Sunday school) and you always make me food."

Hallmark can have their cute rhymes and clever punch lines, my daughter gave me a beautiful Mother's Day message today. There are so many days that as a mom, I do this stuff, not feeling the joy and even the importance of these little tasks of life. But over time, they add up to be meaningful and beautiful to our children.

So, I wanted to remember today, and her sweet words. This blog is for future me, having a hard day, and any others who are in the thick of it as a mom. One day out there, they will notice what you do. The sum of the little things will eventually add up to be very significant to them.


Happy Mother's Day.

Victory in Jesus

When I write the title, I am flooded with memories of my sweet Nazarene church that knew how to rock out some serious old hymns. But today I am feeling triumphant and have to give God the glory. I cannot keep it in.

Anxiety and worry have always been part of my life. From the time I was a little girl, I have been a worry wart. I have this memory of a specific time when I worried (and drove my parents rightfully crazy) because I had lost my new pack of markers. I literally would not go to sleep until they were found. Markers, really? As I got older, I worried about my relationships, and my future. Graduating from college without a ring on my finger consumed me with anxiety.

However, over the past few years, I have found freedom from this. And frankly, I am sleeping so much better now. I am not going to take any credit here. The only cure I have found, is spending time with God. During that time, He has healed my anxious heart, and filled me with trust in Him. He has never let me down.

Sunday, our pastor talked about anxiety and worry, and how it is out of place in the life of a follower or apprentice of Jesus. It reminded me of how far I have come in this particular area of my life. I am sure I will have setbacks over the years to come. I am sure there will be things, that might just pull me back into my old ways. But, I sat in church this week, so full of blessing, that God would work so directly in me.

We will be doing a whole serious on the sermon on the mount and apprenticeship to Jesus, for which I am so excited. I am keenly aware that despite this victory, I still have a lot of stuff, that God wants to work on in me. I am celebrating this victory, yet am also becoming aware of other areas that I need to bring to Him, and allow him to mold.

This month, the theme of my devotional has been trust. I am reading Jesus Calling by Sarah Young, which takes the voice of Jesus and is full of love, hope, depth and nurturing. Yesterday it said "If you keep on stating your concerns to Me, you will live in a state of tension. When you thank me for how I am answering your prayers, your mind set becomes much more positive. Thankful prayers keep your focus on My Presence and My promises."

So often, I forget to give God the glory when he comes through for me. So, I am going to practice thankful prayers. So, thank you God for filling my anxious heart with your faithful love!